[#117]

*croaks* hehe.. voice is cracking.. haha.. zi zuo zi shou.. throat not fully recovered but i ate some mooncake.. irresistible tai li yue bing!! loll.. and taadaa.. cough comes along and voice cracks.. mmmm. nvm.. this will not curb me frm singing out loud to my media library... ~qing ni xiang xin wo.. ai ni shi zhen de~~ feng qi yun yong.. chao lai chao luo.. ren hai zhOng de woOo~ hui yi bu hui pin qiong, qing ni xiang xin wO!! haii. sad lehhz. one of the stupid discmans spoilt my pinguan's cd.. track1 is like almost gone la. ARGH. qi si wo le. i like tt song lorr. haii. hope the other songs wont be affected.. on track3 now.. hai.

inspiring piece of news: 3weeks left to promos! around 22days..

my econs file is so darned THICKK! haha.. i can't imagine lugging it arnd lor.. hai. think lep n math will be even worse.. but i haven't finished packing *can you believe how last min i aM?*.. yaa..

gonna draw up a nice packed schedule for myself ltr.. i must pass my promos. i must not stay in tj for longer than 2 yrs, frm 2oo5-2oo6.. it will be too much to bear.. an extra full yr in tj. yuk.. hmmm. yes.. this is my motivation. it's really very late for me to start chionging but still.... it's useless to sigh and heave about the lost time.

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my impression of jc life.. strange to see how it had chged over the past few mths.. while i was still in dhs, i just thought tt jc life will be a simple continuation.. hmm.. will meet diff pple and get to know diff pple and form a new circle of friends.. tho i will lose some of my sec sch friends.. had this simple belief tt true friends will stick tog. just before stepping into ny, was dreading it like hell and half-worried to death. cos i was the only person frm my gang of dhs friends gg there.. but it turned out to be a fresh experience.. to be an enjoyable 3mths that i wished will nvr ever end.. jc life was good. at jae admission.. actually chged jcs.. my 2 weak reasons of distance and parents. what was the real reason behind?? i guess cos 05A5 was gg to separate aft all.. some chg schs, some chg combi, chg stream.. what's left for me to stay? altho i nvr ever despised ny.. tj did seemed like a more promising choice.. and i didn't want to be burdened by the fact tt i had to do really extra well if i stayed in ny, to prove to my parents.. there.. my renowned laziness. thought prob tj's mugger style will just push me somehow and i won't end up too bad for A lvls.. yea.. entered tj.. till now still don't have any real feelgs for it.. maybe my initial attitude was already a aloof one.. tt's why.. no excuses abt being a 2nd intaker.. prob tj wasn't really the dream jc for mE.. pple's way of thinkg chg over time.. still glad tt i went ny for my first 3 mths. (:.

pple i've met in tj.. mmm.. i just feel that deep inside.. friendships you forge in jc are still surface-type.. nobody really truly cares.. it's just a kind of interdependent relationship ba.. just for accompanying purposes.. aft you reach hm.. then it's just bye. there's no mutual warmth.. just. ya. spending time tog.. enjoying each other's company.. using one another.. ehh. but this is just my opinion la.. hahax. i've known ppl who found their best friends in jc as well.. so.. yaa.. mabbe i've just yet found this one person who can unds me and yaa.. aiya whatever. not like i'm deprived or what.. i still have my friends arnd me who truly care abt me and love me, like i love them! (: but to me.. just hold this impression tt jc friends are just jc friends..

and mmm.. the definition of true friends isn't so simple aft all.. too many factors contribute in a slowly disappearing friendship.. deep down i'd always known that our distance will grow aft we chg schs.. but. it's sad when it really happens. maybe our mindsets have always been different.. but it didn't seem like that.. it hadn't been like that.. but we just outgrew each other? maybe you nvr really cared. but it doesn't seem fair to put it this way.. maybe it was nvr in your priority.. maybe we just hold different opinions twds friendship. but i've lost the ability to keep up a convo with you..

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PROMOS!

ahaha..

must keep reminding myself.. like it's the most exciting thing in the world.

wheeee.

:).

x).

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{chunZz}